“I just think it's important for us to really, really just be grounded in our choice and know that we are doing something natural.”

Why did you decide to breastfeed your children? 

I didn’t think there was any other option. Of course, there was always formula, but I decided to breastfeed my children because I felt like it was the most convenient option. If I felt like I wasn’t producing enough, then I would turn to formula, which I did with my first child. But I always just looked at it as the most convenient, the most economical, the healthiest route for me.

Are you still breastfeeding now?

No. My youngest is going to be two years old next week. My rule is: I’m done at (age) one. 

Were you familiar with breastfeeding before you had children? Did your mother or grandmother breastfeed?

In my family, I only knew of one person who breastfed. When I got pregnant, it was not something my family was really comfortable with. The only thing I would hear was “Don’t be breastfeeding that baby until that baby is two,” or “don’t be breastfeeding that baby at three.” I think that is a deeper conversation about why Black people have that stigma. I knew that me choosing to breastfeed was going to be a new world for me and I needed education to make sure I was able to do it properly.

What surprised you along your breastfeeding journey?

By my third child I got the hang of it, but I was very surprised with the challenges. I have larger breasts and I knew that me having more breast tissue would be a challenge. I was so envious of people with smaller breasts. I was also surprised by how hard it was for me to produce milk. I had to change my eating in order for me to produce properly. Also, I knew I was going to be tired, but I didn’t know I was going to be as tired as I was. It is a full-time job.

A lot of our family members and the generations before us have stigma that comes along with breastfeeding. Did you feel supported in your decision to breastfeed?

Oh yes. Family members may have things to say, but overall I come from a very supportive family that really lets you choose what’s best for you. I always felt supported. I never felt uncomfortable. No one ever told me to cover up. I’m so grateful for that because I know it’s not everyone’s experience. 

What is your favorite part about your breastfeeding journey?

It is such a specific bond with each one. I remember breastfeeding in the hospital. I remember breastfeeding each one in their nursery. It is just such a bonding experience and yet it is fleeting. It just goes by. It is the only time where you’re just hanging out with them. It’s a bonding experience like no other. After you deliver, they can’t go back into your belly. This was like the next closest that I felt to them. It is just such a special bond.

When did you know that you were done with breastfeeding or your children were ready to transition to solid foods?

My oldest one, it was pretty easy, because I wan’t producing a lot of milk after five or six months. My second and third, they both started biting me around age one, and that was my wake-up call. 

What advice would you give to a new mother or someone starting their breastfeeding journey?

I think that social media is a beautiful place to find information but I do feel like it can be very overwhelming when it comes to breastfeeding. We’re looking for quick answers, but you can get overwhelmed with all the information you receive. Read a book or talk with another mom who has breastfed before. Be confident knowing that motherhood is one of those things that has been happening since the beginning of time. 

Is there anything else about your journey that you’d like to share that I didn’t ask about?

There is so much stigma and pain that we need to release as Black mothers. The image of a mother breastfeeding is often a Black woman because we were wet nurses for so long in this country. I know we were not the first women to breastfeed, but on the American landscape we took care of a lot of children. I think that stigma is so prevalent in our culture and that’s the reason we’re so judgmental about breastfeeding. We don’t even like to see that image. I think it is really important for us to be grounded in our choice and know that we are doing something natural. We are doing something for our children. There are going to be people who don’t understand it, who don’t get it. There’s a lot of work that has been done, and a lot of growth that we’ve done as Black people, but there’s still more we have to put out there. I think us breastfeeding our children and taking care of our own children with pride, with confidence, is something that is still hard for people to see.